


With My Boots On

by JustForTommo



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Blood, Bull Riding, Cowboys, Drinking, F/M, Fluff, Horseback Riding, Hospitalization, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Injury, M/M, Major Character Injury, Pining, Recreational Drug Use, Sexuality Acceptance, Smut, harry teaches louis to ride horses, it's based in small-town texas of course there's going to be homophobia, mild sexuality crisis, not too much though, rodeo, the usual
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-01
Updated: 2015-06-10
Packaged: 2018-04-02 06:57:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4050553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustForTommo/pseuds/JustForTommo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"It's boots and chaps. It's cowboy hats. It's spurs and latigo. It's the ropes and the reins, and the joy and the pain, and they call the thing rodeo."</p><p>Harry rides bulls for kicks, Niall can barrel race with the best of them, Liam's the farmhand and best friend, and Louis' the city boy who wants to learn to fly. Add a dash of sexuality crisis, classic romps in the hay, and adorable horses, and you've got yourself a fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have had the idea for this fic since I finished Truth Be Told last summer. I'd written the first chapter a while ago, but then got major writers block. I've worked out the plot probably 10 times and then wanted to change it all. I'm hoping that by posting the first chapter, it will make me want to keep going and motivate me to actually write the fic.
> 
>  
> 
> [Photoset](http://donnyscheshire.tumblr.com/post/120432708294) / [Playlist](http://8tracks.com/justfortommo/with-my-boots-on) / [Tumblr](http://donnyscheshire.tumblr.com)

Louis hates hot weather. That’s exactly why he’d loved living in Seattle. It was always cold and the sun never smothered him in heat. He lived for comfy sweaters and sweats that were too long for his short legs, fuzzy blankets and mugs filled with the hottest tea. Louis absolutely _hates_ hot weather. It makes him sticky and sweaty and gross.

His family crossed the state line into Texas mere hours ago and Louis has already decided that he also hates Texas. It's only late April, there is no reason for his skin to be roasting.

The scenery around him is boring and his butt is numb from riding in the car for so long. His gaze lands on endless cornflower blue skies and flat land. Louis already misses the skyscrapers and the feeling of being suffocated by all the people rushing by. There is too much air here, too much space to let his mind wander. He has always had a hyperactive brain, always has the prickling urge under his skin to keep moving and be surrounded by people. This just isn't going to work for him.

Louis sighs and leans his head against the warm glass of the window. His forehead slides against the glass from the perspiration on his skin, and he groans.

“Almost there, honey,” his mother, Jay, says from the driver’s seat. She hums along to the song on the radio, some obnoxious country song that Louis can’t stand the sound of, and taps her fingers on the steering wheel.

“Don’t be a baby, Louis!” Lottie calls from the back seat. She smacks her gum obnoxiously at him, knows he hates the sound, and Louis wants to snap at her, but the hot sun has zapped all of his energy.

“I didn’t say anything,” Louis grumbles out. He hears his youngest sister, Daisy, giggle from the backseat beside Lottie and he rolls his eyes.

It’s just him and the girls against the world, he supposes. After Daisy and Lottie’s dad left a few months ago, it’s been just them: Louis and a house full of emotional women. Daisy, only six and too young to understand why her dad isn’t coming back, Lottie, fresh into high school and having to pick up shop and move across the country, and his mother, a strong woman who tries to hide the pain in her eyes with a soft smile. Louis loves them dearly, he does, but he just doesn’t understand why his mother felt the need to make them move across the country to a God forbidden small town in the East Texas.

God forbidden. Louis snorts to himself. That's another thing he hates about Texas, or just the South in general. Back home, Louis had been out and proud, flamboyant and loud, loud, loud, and completely comfortable in his own skin. Here, well, Texas would have to be a different story. He's heard stories. He knows what the majority of the South's opinion on gay people is. He would rather not be chased down and beaten because he prefers a nice dick every now and then, thanks. He can't remember off the top of his head if Texas has signed anything about allowing gay marriage, or any type of equality act, but he'd rather not go snooping and draw suspicion.

An hour or so later, Louis' legs are cramping and a twinge of pain sparks up his back from sitting in the car for too long. His mother pulls off the main highway, a two lane road the stretches on for miles and miles, onto a gravel road. The sun beats down on the hood of the car and bakes the inside of the vehicle even with the air conditioning on high. There’s a house at the end of the lane, tall with an old antebellum style architecture: white wraparound porch and wide windows trimmed in blue shutters. It sits atop a small hill, grass immaculately cut and flowerbeds evenly sorted.

They bypass the over-the-top house and turn down another gravel road, a bit more uneven than the one they were just on. A little rocking and bouncing in their seats leads them to a quaint cottage about a half mile from the turn-off. There are a few trees dotting the area and the house is made or worn, old wood. It’s nice though, small and rustic looking. Much better than the atrocity that they just drove by.

“We’re here,” Jay calls, parking the car outside the front steps.

They all pile out of the car, Lottie grumbling at Daisy pushing her out the car, and stretch out their cramped limbs. It was a 32 hour drive from their cozy home in Seattle and they had only stopped to once. Louis felt dead on his feet.

“Alright, everyone grab what you can,” Jay calls as she opens the door to their U-Haul trailer. It’s jam packed with memories from their old life. They’d had to leave so much behind, but at least they’d been able to keep the memorable stuff.

Louis reaches out and grabs a box with his name scribbled on the side, as well as another with Daisy’s name written in looping letters on the top. The rest of the gang grabs what they can as they hurry inside.

The house is musty, obviously hasn’t been lived in for a while, but it’s still nice. There’s a small living room with a brick fireplace in the far corner – why would they need a fire when it’s hot as hell outside, Louis doesn’t know – and a hallway that leads to what appears to be a washroom and a set of stairs that will lead to their bedrooms. The kitchen is on the right, and as he glances in he sees a large bay window and white countertops covered in dust.

It’ll do.

They’ve never been particularly wealthy, this family of his, what with his mother as a Midwife and an ex-father figure who worked in construction. They don’t need much, the lot of them. They’ve always been tightknit and Louis knows that he doesn’t need a lot of luxury to be happy.

Louis dashes up the stairs and lays claim to a bedroom with a window on the far side that looks out to an old barn. He slides open the window, struggling to unstick the sides for an easy glide, and watches dust billow out into the hot air outside. He sees a guy about his age walking around the barn, flannel shirt tied around his waist and black shirt fitted to his body, legs clad in loose fitting jeans. Louis watches as the guy grabs a bale of hay and throws it over his shoulder before disappearing into the barn. Louis can’t see too well from his stance by the window, but the guy looks buff and Louis could definitely get used to the view.

“Louis, come help, you lazy-butt!” Lottie calls from downstairs. Louis pushes away from the window and heads downstairs to finish unpacking.

***

It’s two days later when Louis finally gets a chance to go over to the barn and investigate the area around their little house. Technically they don’t even own the house. They’re renting it from the people that live in the white house on the hill. His mother had explained when Lottie and Daisy were asleep last night that they didn’t have the funds to outright buy a house since they’re down to just her salary now that Mark’s gone and that this was the best option. She’s going to start working at the hospital in town in the delivery room in a few days, and maybe once they get a steady income again, they’ll be able to afford their own place.

Louis hates owing anyone anything, so renting a house from someone he doesn’t even know isn’t something he’s fond of.

Louis moves out from the line of trees around his home and walks across a field to the barn. It’s made of old, splintered wood and has obviously been standing for many years. It looks to be about the same age as his house, and he thinks that it’s possible that his house used to be the main farmhouse before the glorious white house on the hill was built. He’s so caught up in admiring the way the windows bow inwards and the hinges have rusted over time and strain to keep the doors in place, that he nearly walks into the boy he’d seen a few days ago from his window.

“Oh, sorry,” Louis says when their shoulders collide. Definitely buff.

“Oh, no, my fault,” the other guy says. He takes a look at Louis and his lips curl into a smile. “You must be part of the family that’s renting the old house over yonder. I’m Liam.”

Louis nods and accepts the hand that Liam stretches out. “Louis, and yeah, we’re living there now.”

Liam nods and retracts his hand, smile still firmly set into his face. He’s got kind brown eyes, and Louis thinks he could very well make a friend out of this Liam guy. He seems friendly enough, and while his muscles are impressive, his short cut chesnut hair and sturdy build aren't exactly Louis' type.

“I’ve actually got to move these tools into the barn, but then I can show you around if you'd like,” Liam says, motioning to the saw and nails on the ground.

“That’d be great, actually,” Louis says, reaching down to pick up some nails. Liam gives him a grateful smile.

They walk into the barn and Liam nods to a workbench over to the side.

“Just put the nails down over there,” he says as he hangs the saw on the wall.

Louis does as he’s told before taking a step back and looking around the barn. The flooring is made of compacted dirt and there is a central aisle between what appear to be horse stables. Louis walks over and watches a horse beat its hoof into the dirt and huff a breath through it's gigantic nose. Louis backs away as the horse whinnies at him, not sure how to react to such a powerful looking animal.

He hears Liam chuckle from behind him. “Not a big fan of horses, then?”

“I’ve…I’ve never been around them. I grew up in Seattle, so I haven’t had much experience with farm animals.”

Liam nods and smiles again. He leads them on through the barn and points out various horses as they go.

Louis stops at one horse’s stall in particular. There’s a wooden sign above the stall with the name Stargazer scrawled into wood. She’s a beautiful horse; silky, jet black coat and white star etched between eyes with a soft tuff of hair. She watches Louis for a moment before sticking her nose out at him, as if asking to be petted. Louis raises a hand slowly and allows the horse to nudge against his fingers.

“Wow,” Liam says in a surprised tone. “She never lets anyone but Harry touch her.”

Louis reaches up further to pet behind her ear and Stargazer moves into his touch.

“Really? She seems so gentle.”

Louis looks over to see Liam shaking his head in awe. “I’ve been trying to get her to warm up to me for years.”

Louis drops his hand eventually and Stargazer huffs at him, cross that she’s no longer being shown affection. Louis laughs lightly and steps away from her stall.

“Who’s Harry?” he asks by way of changing the subject. “Does he work here, too?”

Liam shakes his head and smirks. “Nah, his family owns the place.”

“Oh.”

Liam motions towards the door and Louis follows him outside. The sun beats down on the back of their necks as they walk, and Louis reaches up to push his sweaty fringe out of his face.

“Is it always so hot here?” Louis asks through a sigh. He can feel sticky perspiration start to bubble on the surface of his skin.

“You haven’t seen anything, dude.” Liam turns and looks at him with a slightly pitying, but mostly humorous smile. "It's only April."

Louis groans but follows Liam as he walks down a dirt path between a couple trees. They enter a field with dirt lanes cut between green tuffs of vegetation, what crop is growing Louis doesn’t know, and head towards a tractor. There’s another guy sitting atop the contraption, legs propped up on the steering wheel and back pressed against the leather seat. His head is tipped back and a tanned Stetson keeps the sun off his face.

“Harry!” Liam calls as the approach.

The boy on the tractor shifts into a sitting position and looks over at them.

“Liam!” he calls, flailing his arms out to the side. When his eyes meet Louis’ his smile turns into something cordial and polite. “Hello!”

“This is Louis, he’s living in the old farm house,” Liam says, motioning to Louis and leaning against the tractor.

Louis lifts up a hand and waves at Harry, a bit awkwardly, and Harry looks down at him, blinking his huge green eyes. He’s quite pretty, curls framing his face and boyish features defined by a sharp, manly jawline.

“Hello,” Harry says again, jumping down from the tractor. “Harry Styles.” He sticks out a hand and Louis shakes it without taking his eyes from Harry’s face.

“Hey,” he manages to squeak out.

Louis has known since he was seven that he preferred boys to girls. It was a natural thing. He’d come home one day and told his mother that he had a crush on his friend Tommy, and she’d hugged him and said “Of course you do, Honey.” That was that. Louis can’t keep his eyes off of Harry because he’s pretty sure that Harry’s the prettiest boy that he’s ever seen.

The only problem with this revelation is that Louis is currently in the middle of Texas, hot and hellish Texas, staring at a pretty boy. He’s in the Deep South where bigoted people roam free and homophobia is so prevalent that these southerners can probably smell the gay radiating off of him. There is no way that this gorgeous boy would even look at Louis if he knew how weak in the knees he felt just watching those pretty green eyes.

Harry smirks down at him, sinful lips pulled to the side, and his eyes glint with an emotion that Louis can't quite place.

“I was just showing Louis around a bit. We went to see the horses, and guess what happened,” Liam says, still a bit at awe. Harry looks over at his friend, finally taking his eyes off of Louis and allowing Louis to breathe, and raises his eyebrow. “Stargazer took a shining to him immediately! That damned horse hasn’t let me touch her yet, and I’ve been around her for years!”

Harry raises both eyebrows at Louis and gives him an impressed nod. “Speaking of Star, Mom said I needed to go wash her down before tonight.”

"I can do it," Liam offers. "It is kind of my job and all."

Harry shakes his head and gives Liam a smile. "Nah, I'll do it. I didn't get to see her yesterday." Harry reaches over and gives Liam a hug and pulls Louis into a one armed hug as well before giving them a wave and walking off towards the barn.

Louis watches after him and when he turns back to Liam, Liam’s smirking at him with a knowing look on his face. Louis rolls his eyes and scruffs his TOMS into the dirt below him. His skin suddenly feels itchy and his muscles tense. Maybe he shouldn't have been so blatant about staring. He looks down to make sure he isn't doing that thing with his wrists. Masculine. Right. He can do this.

“We gotta get you some proper shoes, man,” Liam tells him as he starts walking through the crops again. Liam turns back and gives him the same friendly and open smile he had on his face earlier. Maybe Louis didn't do anything too flamboyant to freak him out. "You come over and get ready for tonight?”

“Tonight?” Louis asks confusedly. He begins to follow after him anyway.

“Yeah, there’s a rodeo most every weekend, depending on the weather. The whole town goes and it’s a big time.”

Louis shrugs and hops a fence onto a dirt road. Louis struggles over the beams, not quite as tall as Liam, but manages without falling on his face. Liam gives him a reassuring pat on the back before taking off down the lane.

“You can come over to mine if you want and get ready. I’ve got some proper boots you can borrow.” Louis scoffs and looks down at his beat up TOMS. He loves his shoes. “They’re no match for the mud and dirt around here. Might have worked for you in the city, but you’re in the country now.”

Louis sighs and concedes as they come upon a brick house on the other side of the bridge. It’s a one-story, ranch-styled home and Louis can tell from the way the flower beds are made with mismatched colors and an old wheeled barrow sits outside the front porch, that his house is much loved. He follows Liam into the house and into his room, taking in the family photos and the homey decor as they move.

“Mom and Dad are still at work. You can sit on the bed if you want,” Liam says, pointing to the bed covered in a hand-sewn quilt. Liam rummages around in his drawers and picks up a red plaid shirt, eyeing it and Louis at the same time. “This’ll do,” he declares and throws the garment at Louis.

“What, am I supposed to wear this?” Louis asks, eyeing the shirt. He wants to burn it, but that's probably not very nice and won't make him friends with the friendly puppy of a man he's encountered. “It's plaid! What’s wrong with the shirt I’ve got on?”

He’d rolled out of bed and thrown on jeans and a white shirt that had a rainbow and two skeleton hands on it. On second thought, he probably shouldn’t wear this shirt around town. Or even on the farm. Might give off the wrong idea...or the right one.

“Nothing’s wrong with it,” Liam assures him. His eyes are so sincere that Louis thinks he’d even let Louis wear the rainbow shirt 24/7 if he wanted to. “It just gets a bit chilly at night and I wanted you to be comfortable.”

Louis nods and thanks him before changing. The plaid button up is soft, clearly well worn, and while it may be a little too warm to wear it right now, he knows he’ll appreciate it once the sun goes down.  It doesn't look as hideous as he thought it would. He leaves a few buttons undone at the top and rolls his sleeves up past his elbow.

“Here are some boots.” Liam passes Louis some old work boots, worn brown leather and black laces.

“Thanks.” It kills Louis to change shoes, he really does love his Toms, but he wants to fit in as well. He would like to make a good impression at the first small town event he goes to. At least they aren't cowboy boots.

A woman’s voice calls from another room and Liam perks up. “That’s my mom. You can stay for dinner if you want.”

Louis nods and bites his lip. His mother’s not working yet so she should be home to feed the girls. He pulls out his phone and shoots her a text just in case.

Louis pockets his phone and follows Liam out into the living room and into the kitchen. His mother is warm and welcoming, giving him a tight hug and ushering him to get seated so she can dish out the takeaway KFC she grabbed on the way home from work. Liam explains that his father works late at the local bank, so he’s often not home for dinner.

“I love KFC so much!” Liam almost moans before biting into more of his chicken. Louis laughs and his mother just rolls her eyes.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” she reprimands lightly.

When the sun sets they clamber into Liam’s truck and set towards town. Liam jabbers on about his studies at the college a few towns over and Louis informs him that he’s taking a break from school at the moment, but that he'll probably go eventually. His grades hadn’t been great in high school and without a substantial scholarship, there was no way his family can afford tuition right now.

They pull up to an already packed parking lot and Liam shows him the way to the festivities. They pass a concessions stand with a man shouting about fresh burgers and hot dogs and Louis spots his sisters and mother standing in line. He waves at them and points them out to Liam, but doesn’t feel like going and interacting.

Children run around, some with small lassos twirling above their heads, cowboy hats falling back and hanging off of their necks by strings. Dirt kicks up under their boots and gets on their pants, but the kids seem used to getting dirty. Louis wrinkles his nose at all the dust, but Liam nudges his shoulder and points to the stands.

“Let’s get a good seat before the barrel racing starts, yeah?”

They find a seat towards the middle of the stands on an empty row and get settled. The sun casts its last glimmers onto the soft earth, and the lights around the arena flash on. Louis has to blink away the starts in his eyes.

Louis doesn’t have to wait long for the action to begin. He watches his mother sit down with his younger sisters a few rows down from them as the announcer comes on the radio to tell the crowd that the first contestant for the barrel races is ready. He watches as a man with darkly rooted hair and blonde tips puts on a hat and digs his heels into his horse.

The horse, a beautiful silver color with a white mane, shoots out of the gate and Louis watches, enthralled, as the boy navigates his horse around the barrels. He’s got excellent form, not that Louis has ever watched this sort of thing before, but he seems sure of his movements and it’s a beautiful thing to watch. The boy rounds his last barrel and it’s like he’s shot out of a gun, his horse positively takes off towards the gate again and he looks like he’s flying.

Louis wants to fly like that.

The electrifying blonde-tipped boy ends up winning the whole competition. His name is Niall, Louis learns, and is apparently one of Liam’s best friends. Liam cheers extra loud when Niall receives his prize and Niall bows to his adoring crowd. He looks up and makes a funny face in their direction and Liam cackles before hooting some more. Louis really wants to meet this kid.

He gets his chance while the workers clear out the barrel racing equipment to switch over to the main event: the rodeo. Liam leads Louis to the back gates, where Niall’s standing with his horse, hosing it down and cooing about the win.

“Li!” Niall shouts and jumps into Liam’s waiting arms, sweaty body rubbing all over Liam’s clean clothes.

“You smell awful,” Liam huffs, but he’s grinning. “Congratulations, man!”

Niall drops to his feet and his face looks like the sun, he’s grinning so hard. He’s got expressive blue eyes, Louis notices, eyes that shine with glee and don’t dim when he turns to Louis.

“‘M Louis,” he says by way of introduction. “That was so sick!”

Niall blushes a bit and laughs, shrugging. “Just get lots of practice in, that’s all. I’m Niall, nice to meet ya.”

Louis returns Niall’s smile and they shake hands. “It looked like you were flying at the end of it.”

“Felt like it. That’s what I love about doing this.”

Louis nods. He looks over at Niall’s horse. “What’s her name?”

“His name's Seamair,” Niall says, patting his hind haunches. "It's Irish for clover."

“Oh, hello Seamair,” Louis coos, reaching out a hand. Seamair snorts at his outstretched fingers and Louis makes a face which causes Niall to burst out laughing.

“Sorry about that,” Niall says once he’s calmed down.

“Nah, it’s fine. Just wasn’t expecting it.” Louis grimaces before wiping his hand on his jeans. He’ll definitely need to wash them soon.

“Didn’t take quite the shine to you as Stargazer did,” Liam says, patting Seamair’s neck.

“Stargazer doesn’t like anyone,” Niall says petulantly, like a child denied a toy. “Hates everyone but Harry. I've been boarding Seamair at Harry's stables for ages, and she won't even greet me. Gets along with Seamair just fine though." If Louis didn't know any better, he would think Niall was jealous of his own horse.

“Not Louis,” Liam says with a smug grin. “She likes Louis.”

Niall grumbles something about horse mind control or something that Louis can’t quite catch and shakes his head. The loud speakers crackle and Liam turns back to the stands.

“We better go back, the rodeo’s about to start.”

“Alright. It was nice to meet you, Niall,” Louis says with a wave before heading back to the stands.

The first thing that Louis notices is that the arena floor has been completely emptied. The second thing he notices is that there are caged bulls to the far side where the barrel racers entered and exited before. The bulls are bounding against their cages, raringto go.

“Why would anyone want to ride those things?”

Liam snorts and glances over at him. “Because people are stupid.”

Louis nods and sets his eyes onto the bulls again. He watches a guy get onto one, another man gives him a signal, and the gates open. The bull jumps and bucks like a bat out of hell, and Louis is certain that only insane people participate in such an act. The man is bucked off 5 seconds in, and the bull nearly steps on his skull.

Louis shudders. “Maniacs. That’s who enjoys doing that,” he says, which makes Liam laugh.

“Agreed.”

Louis hears Daisy's squeal from below and glances down to make sure she's not too scared of the bulls. She's got her hands clasped over her mouth and wide eyes trained on the handlers trying to get the bull back in its cage.

“Harry Styles, everyone!” Louis' head shoots up to look at the bulls again.

Everyone in the crowd stands up and starts to cheer. He’s obviously well liked, Louis thinks as he stands up beside Liam.

“Harry’s also a maniac,” Liam says, with a shrug and a smile.

Louis can’t keep his eyes off of the boy with the curls. He watches Harry push his curls back into a scarf and place the Stetson he had on earlier on top of his head. His eyebrows scrunch together in concentration and he darts his tongue out to lick his lips. Louis licks his own lips. Harry takes a deep breath and nods to the man on the gate who gives the signal. A couple seconds later, the gate opens.

Louis can’t breathe. He’s terrified that this beautiful boy is going to fall off and get trampled but it’s also probably the hottest thing he’s ever witnessed. Harry’s got so much control. His biceps bulge under his ripped off flannel sleeves and his thighs clinch around the middle of the bull as he shifts his weight and tries to anticipate the movement of the animal under him. The bull bucks and spins, but Harry stays right with it.

The lights flash and a timer buzzes and Harry loosens his grip and falls to the side, thankfully out of the way of the bull’s hooves. He stands up and the crowd goes absolutely wild. Louis just tries to breathe.

Harry ends up coming in second but he still gets a reward for staying the full 8 seconds. Louis claps and cheers right along with Liam, and Liam smirks at him. Louis clears his throat and fidgets, fingers balling into fists at his side. Liam nudges him with his shoulder and gives him a warm, reassuring smile. Louis doesn't know what to do with that.

Once the awards are given out, Louis tells Liam that he’ll see him in a bit and goes down to his family. The girls chatter excitedly about the events and his mother watches them fondly. Daisy doesn't seem worried about the bulls anymore, but more excited about all the action and the shiny trophies.

“Have fun tonight, kiddo?” his mother asks as he approaches.

“Don’t call me that,” Louis says, sticking his hands in his pocket.

“Did you see that guy named Harry! He was so cute!” Lottie squeals. Louis frowns at her before shaking his head. His eyes look over her shoulder to see if he can find the boy in question.

He spots him next to Niall. They’re leaning against the gate, bottle of beer in both their hands, talking amicably amongst themselves. Liam pops up behind them and gives Harry a bear hug before stealing his beer and taking a sip. Louis thinks he can hear Harry squawk at him from here.

A blonde girl comes up beside them and Harry turns to grin at her. Louis watches as they hug and then they’re kissing, Harry gripping her by the waist and her fingers running through his sweaty curls.

Well, that answers that question then.

***

Louis’ nails scratch under the label of his bottle of beer before he brings the spiff to his lips and takes a long pull. He can feel the liquid of his other few beers sloshing around in his stomach and all he can hear is the roaring of the fire in front of him and the babble of the stream a couple yards away. He lifts his eyes from the ground as Niall nudges his shoulder, and takes the proffered spiff, inhaling deeply and letting the thick smoke curl slowly out of his lungs.

It’s a week after the rodeo, seven nights after Louis realized that Harry is definitely into girls, and seven long days since he'd watched Harry kiss the blonde and come away with red lipstick stained lips. Louis looks to the other side of the fire to see the same blonde, Annabelle, he’d learned, snuggled under Harry’s arm, brown eyes focused on the fire in front of them, and fingers scratching at his chest absently. They make a pretty sight, Louis has to admit, but the feeling deep in his gut, the twisting green eyed monster, says otherwise.

It's stupid, really. He's only talked to Harry once or twice after watching him get thrown around by a bull, and it had all been perfectly friendly. Louis has been shadowing Liam around as he goes about his duties around the farm and Harry had been in the barn when they'd been hanging out. It was nothing. He was just a pretty boy with an abundance of curls and a deep scratchy voice that made Louis' blood singe whenever he opened his mouth.

Louis passes the joint off to Liam on his other side. Liam takes a hit and passes off to his buddy John. Louis hasn’t spent much time talking to John yet, but he seems like a generic but friendly country boy and not too terribly interesting and Louis is too comfortable to move.

Liam had thought it’d be a great idea to get his group of friends down to the river and show Louis what they do on Saturday nights when the sky is clear and the weather isn’t too sticky hot. Louis had agreed, of course, and was grateful to be pulled into a tight knit friend group. He really liked the guys he was surrounded by. They all welcomed him with open arms and Louis didn't feel like he had to constantly keep his mannerisms in check. He just really wished the blonde female would go.

“Hey, Haz!” John calls as he reaches over and passes the joint to Harry.

Harry shakes his head, as if coming out of a daydream, and takes it from John with an easy smile. Louis watches his cheeks hallow as he breathes in. Harry looks up as he inhales, eyes catching Louis’ stare and he has the audacity to wink. Louis scrunches up his nose and tries to look indignant, but he can feel that his face is too flushed to have his desired effect. Harry must realize this because he smirks around the joint before exhaling through his nose like a bull.

Annabelle takes the joint from him, and Harry still doesn’t break his eye contact with Louis. Louis feels syrupy slow, his brain working at half speed but his body lagging behind, and his skin itches to see what Harry’s hair feels like between his fingers. He knew coming out here to smoke was a terrible idea. Weed always makes him horny and stupid. He really doesn't want to do something that outs him to their entire friend group. He's pretty sure Liam's caught on by now, but he's been so kind and Louis feels safe and happy when he's around.

“Babe,” Annabelle whispers, before inhaling. Harry finally glances down at her and she leans up to connect their lips. Louis can’t look away. Harry immediately opens his mouth, breathes in, and then pulls away. He breathes smoke out of his nose again and then leans down to peck at her lips softly before pulling away for good.

Louis goes back to staring at the ground.

Niall starts to cackle beside him and Louis looks over to see he’s got his head tipped back and is pointing at the stars.

“Look at all the stars, bro! They’re so beautiful! I want them all!” he crows, making grabby hands at the dots of light in the sky. “Louis, go get me a star, would you?”

He may not know Niall too well yet, but he’s definitely got a soft spot for the fake-blonde bastard.

“Anything for you, darling,” Louis coos, standing up and reaching for the stars as well.

Louis momentarily freezes with his hands up, wonders if the endearment was too camp, but then the whole group starts to laugh and make their own attempts at grabbing stars.

“Oh no, it burned me!” Louis calls, deciding to milk his reactions for all their worth since his company is taking his antics so well, and clutches his hand with a grimace.

“No!” Niall shouts, grabbing Louis hand and kissing all over it. “Not my baby Lou’s hand!”

Louis snorts and pulls his hand away before it can get slobbered on more.

“I was kidding, you idiot,” Louis says, nudging his shoulder. “You just slobbered all over my hand for no good reason.”

Niall blinks at him, eyelashes resting on his cheeks for a beat too long before he opens his eyes again. “Sorry.”

“Think it’s time for bed,” Liam announces, mainly talking to Niall.

Niall pouts but stands up and pets Louis on the head like he’s a dog.

“Night night, Lou,” he slurs before stumbling off with Liam’s arm around his waist.

Louis snorts and finishes his bottle of beer.

“Think we should all head back,” John says, standing up and stretching. “It’s nearing two in the morning and I’ve got to be in at work at nine.”

They all agree and gather water from the stream to extinguish the fire. Louis watches as the last bits of firelight dances in Harry’s green eyes before it gets extinguished.

“Bye Harry,” Annabelle says, waving a hand at him before turning away from the fire. Harry watches after her for a moment before turning to Louis.

“Want to walk back together?” he asks. Louis shrugs and says goodbye to John before turning the opposite direction.

Harry walks beside him in silence. Their arms brush every few seconds and Louis can’t find it in himself to be bothered by it. It’s nice having the physical reminder that someone’s there with him as he walks through the dark. He stumbles over an upturned root and Harry catches him by the arm, pulling him towards his chest.

“Thanks,” Louis says, breathless.

Harry smiles down at him, soft and easy, and this close, Louis can almost make out the specks of gold in Harry’s eyes intermixed with the emerald. It’s too dark to really see though, so Louis is probably just letting the beer get to his head.

“You’re welcome,” Harry whispers, squeezing Louis’ arm softly before letting go.

They walk for a little while longer until the silence is too much to bear. Louis’ body hums with their proximity and his fingers twitch to reach out and slot his fingers between Harry’s.

“So, I didn’t peg you as a bull rider when I first met you,” Louis says, trying to spark some sort of conversation to keep his mind busy.

“Oh yeah?” Harry asks, an easy smile gracing his lips. “What did you take me as?”

“A simple country boy with a heart of gold,” Louis snarks, shrugging. “I don’t know, not someone who risks his life on the regular in order to have some masculine superiority complex by dominating an animal.”

Harry lets out a sharp bark of laughter, something between a dying animal and a seal’s bark. Louis turns to him with an amused tilt to his lips.

“I don’t have a masculine superiority complex or whatever you think drives me to do it. I just like the adrenaline rush. If you haven’t noticed, there’s not much to do around here.”

Louis turns back to study the dark path before him. He jumps over a log, careful not to catch his toe and die.

“Yeah, but it’s so dangerous. Your head could get smashed open in the blink of an eye or your neck could snap. I just don’t get it.”

Harry shrugs like that doesn’t bother him.

“It is what it is.”

Louis gapes at him, shaking his head back and forth slowly. “What do you mean ‘It is what it is?’ You can literally die from that and you’re just telling me it doesn’t matter?”

“You can die at any second, Louis. You can die from being run over by a tractor. You could suddenly develop a brain aneurism and die right here at my feet and I wouldn’t be able to stop it. You could choke on a hot dog and die at a carnival. Thing is, you’re gonna die sometime and I enjoy the rush I get when I’m riding. At least if I die on a bull, I’ll be in the middle of an adrenaline rush doing something I love.”

Harry slows down and leans against a tree. His hips jut out invitingly and Louis has to fight the urge to stand between his legs and press his thumbs into the sliver of skin his shirt doesn’t cover.

“You’re crazy,” Louis murmurs. “Absolutely bonkers.”

Harry laughs again, something earthy and sweet that rumbles deep in his chest, and Louis wants to record the sound and have it play on repeat for the rest of his life.

“Well, maybe. But what about you? What do you do for kicks?”

Louis scuffs Liam’s old boots into the dirt. He hasn’t given them back yet and Liam hasn’t asked after them.

“I don’t know. I mean I used to get high all the time with my mates back home, but that's kind of lost its thrill along the way. It's fun to do every now and then, but it's not exactly exciting, you know? I’ve never done anything that gives me that rush. I’d like to. I just haven’t found the thing that'll do it. I'm definitely not getting on some stupid bull though.”

Harry grins and nods. “You liked my horse, Stargazer, right?” Louis gives an affirmative sound. “How about I teach you to ride a horse? I doubt a city boy like yourself knows much about riding.”

Louis has twenty three dirty responses to that comment. They flash through his mind as quick as wildfire but he can’t seem to settle on one. Harry, with his curls and pretty cupid bow lips, might actually appreciate some of the jokes he could make. He’s just not sure he wants to tread into that territory with him yet.

If this was Niall, sure. Niall seems like a fun guy to make all sorts of disturbingly obscene jokes with. Harry, though. Well Louis pictures riding _Harry_ instead of horses and he doesn’t exactly know what to do with that yet.

“That sounds good, Harry. I’d love to learn how to ride a horse,” is what he ends up saying. Harry smiles softly at him, eyes sparkling.

“It’s a date.”

Well then. That’s not what he expected to come out of Harry’s mouth and it appeared that Harry hadn’t meant to say that either. His eyes go wide and he bites down on his bottom lip. Louis wants to reach out and pull his lip back out, see if it’s just as pillowy soft as it looks.

“Yeah, ok,” Louis says with a shrug to keep the awkwardness from building. “Tomorrow?”

Harry nods and Louis thinks he might see a blush coloring his cheeks but it’s too dark to tell for sure.

“Yeah, tomorrow’s fine. I have class until three but I’ll be back around 4. I can meet you in the stables.”

Louis can see his small wooden house as they cross through a wheat field. He reaches out and brushes his hand over the top of the crops, lets the soft fibers under his fingers tickle his skin. He smiles at the feeling and looks up at the sky. He can actually see the stars, better now that they're away from the bright fire. This is definitely one plus of being away from the city. The entire sky is filled with glimmering stars of different shapes and sizes. He’s never seen so many in his life.

“There’s so many stars up there,” Louis comments, pointing his finger up and around.

“They’re always there, Lou,” Harry muses, but throws his head back to gaze at the stars anyway.

Louis rolls his eyes at him but continues to glance up as they walk. He wonders if there are aliens that can see him in the middle of this field with Harry. He wonders if there are invisible spaceships flying over his head and he just doesn’t know it.

Harry walks him to the door. Literally. To the door. Louis tries not to think too much about it, but his soft smile gives him away. He stands in front of his door, one hand on the doorknob, and turns to the curly headed boy beside him.

“Thanks for walking me home,” he says.

“You’re welcome,” Harry answers, a soft fondness radiating off of him. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yep.”

They stare at each other for a few moments, caught in a weird tension. Louis feels a tugging sensation pulling him towards Harry, his fingers still itch to touch Harry’s skin, and his veins burn with need. Harry’s brows furrow and his lip pouts out slightly. It’s like he’s considering something monumental, and Louis just wants to wipe his mind clean with a kiss.

“I should go,” Harry whispers.

“You should,” Louis tells him.

They don’t move. They just stare, and somehow, it’s enough for right now. They watch each other, their eyes tracing over each other’s faces slowly as if to memorize every laugh line and crinkle by their eyes.

“Goodnight, Lou.”

Harry steps off the porch quickly as if to yank himself away from the invisible tether that was keeping them in place. He turns and jogs out of the drive and towards the barn. Louis watches him leave, watches the breeze whip across Harry’s shirt and ruffle his hair.

Harry doesn’t go home, just disappears into the barn and Louis lets it be.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Sorry this took a while! I'm going to try for updates once a week, but we'll see. Life gets in the way sometimes. Hope you enjoy the new chapter!
> 
> [Photoset](http://donnyscheshire.tumblr.com/post/120432708294) / [Playlist](http://8tracks.com/justfortommo/with-my-boots-on) / [Tumblr](http://donnyscheshire.tumblr.com)

The next afternoon Louis finds Harry in the stables gently brushing Stargazer down with a soft bristled brush. He’s humming as he works, voice rumbling in his chest and making Louis shiver. The air is hot and oppressive, causing sweat to bead along his neckline as he stands in the doorway and watches Harry rub gentle circles along his horse's side.

Harry glances over and smiles before turning back to Stargazer. Louis watches as Harry slides his hand down the front right leg and clicks his tongue. Stargazer lifts her hoof and lets Harry slide a spade around her horseshoe to clean it off. She stands perfectly still, head held high, as he inspects each horseshoe and then rewards her with a soft kiss to the side of her nose.

Louis is hopelessly endeared.

“Let me put Star back in her stall and then we’ll get started,” Harry tells him, patting Stargazer’s back hip.

Louis watches as Stargazer follows him without a lead through the barn and into her stall. She nudges his shoulder as he turns to walk away and he pulls an apple from his pocket and lets her take it. He rubs her nose as she chomps away before shutting the door. Harry then walks over to another stall and unlocks it, pulling the wooden gate open and ushering out another horse that Louis has never paid attention to.

What a mistake that was.

“This is Danger,” Harry announces, a proud tilt to his voice. “He’s a bit young and inexperienced, a wild heart, but I think he’ll be perfect for you to learn with. He’s actually Stargazer’s colt from a few summers back. I’ve been working with him for a while and he follows instructions well.”

Louis tentatively stretches out his hand and Danger sniffs at it before nudging into his touch. Louis marvels at the shining chestnut coat on the horse, soft to the touch. Danger also has a white patch between his eyes, just like his mother, and Louis pokes it softly. He looks powerful, strong muscles and hind-quarters, but he’s also got a mischievous glint in his eye and the way that he holds himself makes Louis think of a firecracker ready to burst. He suspects they’ll get along just fine.

“He’s beautiful,” Louis whispers, finally turning to take a look at Harry.

Harry puffs out his chest and nods. “I’ve always thought so. Star does make some pretty babies, doesn’t she?”

Louis laughs and nods his agreement. Harry disappears into the tack room and comes back with a worn leather halter, a rope, and a whip. Louis eyes the whip nervously and immediately moves into a defensive stance between Harry and the horse. Harry must notice his shift because his eyes widen and he rushes to explain.

“No, we’re not whipping him! It’s for training. They don’t like the sound and when they see it, the memory of the sound makes them run. We don’t actually hit him with it!” Harry bites his lip and looks down at the whip in his hand like it’s something evil. Louis feels the hot coil of tension leave his stomach and relaxes his posture.

“Oh.”

“I wouldn’t hurt a fly, Louis,” Harry says seriously, eyes wide and posture unthreatening. He watches as Harry glances down at the whip and fiddles with the handle.

“Sorry,” Louis mumbles, staring at the ground.

“C’mon.” Harry motions towards the door and toes at the dirt before taking a step towards Danger.

He secures the halter over Danger’s head easily and attaches the rope to it. Harry hands him the lead and begins to walk out of the door. Louis follows, pulling gently on the lead and eyeing the horse behind him. Danger follows without protest but keeps a careful distance between himself and his leader. They walk out into a circular pen and Harry locks the gate behind them.

“Alright, hold the rope in your left hand, make sure to give it some slack,” he instructs, coming to stand beside Louis. He makes a motion with his hand and Danger moves to the gate rails so his body is parallel with the curve of the bars. “Click your tongue gently and nod in the direction you want him to start walking. Hold the lead out with a bit of slack and hold this,” he says while handing Louis the whip which he takes with shaking fingers, "and hold it pointed down towards his back legs. Don’t snap it, just hold it. It’s a reminder for him to keep going.”

Louis takes a deep breath and clicks his tongue softly. He must not do it loud enough because Danger doesn’t move.

“Little louder, Lou,” Harry calmly instructs. He’s standing behind Louis now and Louis can feel the heat radiating off of him. The sun beats heavy on his back and Harry's proximity makes his blood zing. What he wouldn't do for a nice cold shower right about now. He tries to clear his head so he can focus on the task at hand. Harry’s hand comes up to clutch around the hand Louis is using to hold the lead, and tugs slightly.

Together, they click their tongues and Danger starts to walk slowly around the circle of the pen.

“That’s it,” Harry murmurs. “This is just too warm him up a bit and get some of the excess energy out. Don’t want to put you on him when he’s wound up. I haven’t had time to exercise him lately.”

Louis nods, eyes trained on the way Danger elongates his front legs and pushes off the ground with the power of his hind haunches. His chocolate colored coat gleams in the sunlight and his hoofs kick up dried mud to create dirt clouds in his wake.

“Alright, we need him to go a bit faster now. I want you to click your tongue again and give a small tug on the rope. Be confident. He can sense when you’re going to let him get away with being lazy.”

Louis blows a puff of air out of his nose before clicking his tongue and tugging the rope again. Danger kicks up into a trot, legs lifting high and elegantly before plopping down into the dirt.

Harry slowly takes the whip away from Louis’ grasp and Louis takes a moment to glance back at him. He’s got the whip in his hand, but he’s watching Danger with such gentleness in his eyes that Louis doesn’t feel a need to worry about his intentions anymore.

“We don’t need this anymore. He knows you mean business,” Harry tells him when their eyes meet.

They let Danger circle around a few more times until the horse snorts out a gust of air and his chest heaves. Harry instructs Louis to take a step towards the moving horse, and while Louis definitely thinks this is a horrible decision, he trusts Harry to keep him safe.  Danger senses the change in tension in the lead as Louis takes a attentive step forward and he turns his head to look at Louis, slowing his gate. Eventually Danger stops and appears to be waiting for instruction.

“See that pole over there?” Harry asks, pointing across the yard. “Take him over there for me while I go put the whip back, will ya?”

Louis nods towards the gate entrance once Harry opens it and Danger follows him out and towards the pole. Louis notices that Danger keeps a smaller distance between them and even nudges his nose against the back of Louis’s shirt once before they stop.

“You’re beautiful, you know that?” Louis coos as he pets Danger’s neck. Danger snorts.

“Look at you two getting along,” Harry calls as he approaches. He’s got his hair pulled back into a bun now and Louis wants to rip the elastic band away from his curls and let everything hang loose, run his fingers through what’s sure to be silky threads. “Alright, so this is the saddle and padding,” Harry says, heaving the saddle and saddle blanket up onto Danger’s back. His muscles ripple under his thin black t-shirt and Louis' mouth runs dry.

Louis clears his throat and tries to pay attention. Harry shows him how many times to loop all the straps and which buckles fit where. He glances down at Louis’ legs for a moment before picking a stirrup height and Louis scoffs when he sees how short they are. When he looks back at Harry, he sees the taller boy has a wide grin plastered on his face while his shoulders shake with quiet laughter. Once he's composed himself, Harry shows Louis that Danger tends to stick his stomach out when he’s being saddled so that the saddle doesn’t sit too tight. They pause for a moment and Danger, thinking he's in the clear, lets the air out of his stomach, and Harry demonstrates how the saddle can slip sideways with the extra slack. He tightens the leather straps and pats Danger's hip. Harry changes out the halter for Danger's bridle and turns to Louis with a flourish, sticking his hand out to display his finished product.

“Alright, we’re good to go,” Harry says, wiggling his eyebrows. “Ready?”

Louis shifts his wait and watches Danger duck his head. He takes a deep breath and tries to convince himself that sitting on such a strong and elegant animal is a good idea. Harry extends a calming hand and his grin softens into something more private.

“You’ll be fine, I promise. Won’t let anything happen to you.”

“Yeah, ok, H,” Louis says warmly, chest constricting as the unfamiliar nickname rolls off his tongue.

Louis tries to put his foot into the stirrup and pull himself up, but his legs are just a little too short. Harry snickers and grabs Louis by the waist to hoist him up. If he wasn’t so distracted by actually being on top of a living, breathing animal that could definitely buck him off at any moment, Louis would have probably tried to make Harry's job harder and tested how much of his weight Harry could hold for an extended period of time. For science.

“There you go,” Harry says with a bit of cheek, grinning like the cat that got the cream. Louis glares down at him then puffs out his chest to appear taller and mightier. Harry just laughs and shakes his head. “Alright. Hold on to the reins here and here, thumbs pointed up against the leather. I’m going to use the lead rope and guide Danger around a bit so you can get the feel of a horse moving under you. Be sure not to pull back on the reins, let them be slack. Pulling back means stop and we don’t want to give him mixed signals.”

Louis nods shakily and holds the reins tightly but makes a conscious effort to keep his hands forward and the reins slack as Harry starts to walk. Danger follows obediently but his ears flick back and forth like he’s not sure which person he’s supposed to be listening to. Louis reaches forward and plays with his mane and pets his neck.

Harry takes them back around the barn and circles back towards Louis’ house. They pass by the fence that encompasses his new home and Louis watches Daisy gape at him from the front porch. She’s got a Barbie in her hand but her eyes are following Louis.

“Is that your sister?” Harry asks as they walk by.

“Yeah, that’s the youngest one. Her name’s Daisy.” Harry waves and Daisy waves back, but stays where she’s seated. “You’ll have to come by for dinner sometime and meet her and the rest of them officially.”

Harry beams at him and Louis is momentarily out of breath from the way his eyes shine.

“I’d like that,” he says before turning back and tugging Danger slowly along.

***

They meet a couple times a week after their first lesson so that Harry can teach him how to ride. Louis quickly gets the hang of putting on the saddle and bridle, and often has Danger done up before Harry comes running into the barn with a wide grin and open arms ready for a hug.

It becomes a thing.

Or at least that’s what Louis likes to think.

His days become filled with Harry’s smile and lush curls. Louis keeps track of all the times he gets Harry to let out a strangled laugh, a choked barking sound that always makes Harry cover his face in embarrassment and blush a pretty pink. It’s the best sound that Louis has ever heard. Harry often brings sweets that his mother has baked to share between them as they catch each other up on what’s been happening in their lives, even if it's only been a day since they last met up.

Then Harry teaches him to ride. Harry’s hands move sure and steady as they check the saddle is on properly and everything is tied tight. His voice becomes low and gruff as he raises it to where Louis can hear from a good distance away as he teaches Louis how to maneuver Danger. Louis loves the feeling of being on horseback, the freedom and the power he feels as he lets Danger fly.

Louis’ favorite lesson so far was when Harry let him slacken the reins and kick Danger up into a canter. It had been like he was on a giant rocking horse and he’d had to squeeze tight with his thighs to make sure he didn’t get bumped off. It was exhilarating, the wind in his hair and his adrenaline firing through his veins. He knows that horses can go much faster, but the small taste of Danger's powerful strides and the speed and agility of the horse beneath him had been addicting.

That was last week. This week, Harry’s supposed to show him how to gallop.

That was until his mother decided she had other plans for him.

She texts around three and tells him that he needs to go into town and get some supplies for dinner. She’s got to work late and she doesn’t have time to stop by the store and get dinner on the table at a reasonable hour. Louis sighs and yells over his shoulder that Lottie’s in charge until he gets back. She grumbles her reply and he heads out.

He’s supposed to meet Harry at four, but it doesn’t look like that’s going to work out. Unfortunately, in all this time that they’ve spent together, they haven’t actually exchanged phone numbers. They’ve just been setting up times to meet after each lesson.

 The truck he drives is a secondhand, beat-up pickup that Harry's family loaned his mother so they'd have an extra vehicle around for moments like this, and Louis is always worried that the old piece of junk is going to fall apart at any moment. It takes thirty minutes to get into town and he falls into a flat run to get to the store as quickly as possible. Mrs. Amy, an elderly woman who seems to know everyone in town, is in front of him at the cash register and apparently it's crucial that she tell the cashier every single thing that has happened throughout her day while she digs in her overstuffed purse for that last penny to make her total.  She babbles on and on and Louis checks his phone to see that it’s already 4:15. He’s late and Harry’s going to think he stood him up. That's definitely not making a good impression on the pretty boy with the curls. Not that Louis is trying to make a good impression or anything. It's just...common decency to show up on time. Especially if it means a warm smile and strong arms pulling him into a hug.

It’s five o’clock when he walks through the door, plastic bags banging into his knee and causing his fingers to feel like they’re being chopped off. Louis doesn’t expect Harry to still by the stables waiting for him, but he hopes Harry's at least still around the barn somewhere so Louis can say hello.

"Someone come get the groceries! I've got to meet Harry!" Louis shouts as he sets the bags down in the hallway.

“Do you mean this Harry?” Daisy asks with a giggle, poking her head around the corner to smile at Louis.

“What?” he asks, walking towards her.

Harry’s sitting on his living room couch next Lottie, his hair pulled back by a blue and purple headscarf and a thin green shirt covering his torso. His mile long legs, covered in tight, black skinny jeans, are stretched out in front of him and Louis watches a smile take over Harry’s face when he looks up.

“Harry,” Louis says, breathless from the beautiful boy beaming at him. “What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t there for riding and I got worried,” he says, standing up quickly and walking over.

"Oh, I had to go into town to get some groceries for dinner. I'm going to put them away; I'll be back in a minute."

Harry follows him into the kitchen anyway and picks up a few of the bags from the hall. He leans against the counter, arms crossed and fingers pulling at his plump bottom lip, as his eyes track Louis' movements around the kitchen. Louis thinks he might see Harry staring at his ass as he bends over to put the chicken in the fridge, but maybe that's his sex deprived imagination.

He makes quick work of the groceries and soon all four of them are sitting on the couch together while Lottie flips through the channels at an alarmingly quick rate. How can she even tell what's on?

“Dais, what are you doing?” Louis asks as he smiles over at his baby sister who's been enraptured with Harry ever since they moved back into the living room.

“Harry said I could braid his hair earlier, but his curls are getting in the way. It’s really difficult,” she explains, poking her tongue out between her lips.

“I’m sorry my hair’s so curly, Daisy,” Harry mumbles, eyes trained on Louis’ face. He winces when Daisy pulls too hard on one of the strands.

“Don’t be sorry, H. I like your curly hair. ‘Specially them curly bits there,” Louis says, pressing the tip of his finger to the nape of Harry’s neck. Harry squawks and bats his hand away.

“Louis!” Daisy cries. “You’re messing me up!”

“Sorry, pumpkin,” Louis says, muffling a laugh into the back of his hand.

Harry giggles, like actually giggles, and Louis’ heart swells. He knows there’s a fond look all over his face, but he can’t stop himself. Harry’s the embodiment of everything good in the world, wrapped up in a six-foot bubbling oaf.

“Keep it down! I’m trying to watch Say Yes to the Dress!” Lottie huffs, turning the volume up on the TV.

They quiet down and watch the show with her. Harry makes faces at the gigantic tulle ball gowns and Louis shakes his head at the almost completely see through cocktail dresses. Everyone hates the mothers who make their daughters cry.

“I’m home!” his own mother calls from the doorway. She walks in to find four sets of eyes on her and freezes. “Oh, and who is this?”

“This is Harry! He’s my new best friend!” Daisy chirps. “I braided his hair, see!” She points excitedly to the small braid she’d managed to work into Harry’s curls.

“Very good, sweetheart,” Jay says with a smile. “You staying for dinner Harry? You’re more than welcome.”

“I don’t want to intrude,” Harry says, blushing a bit.

“No, I insist!” she says before heading to the kitchen and settling the matter.

“What are we having?” Harry asks, snuggling back into the couch.

“Think we’re doing marmite chicken. I have a friend who's from England and he introduced it to me a while back. Tried it, loved it, and now it’s my favorite meal.” Harry wrinkles his nose and Louis laughs. “You don’t have to stay and eat it if you don’t want to.”

“No, I’ll stay. I’ll just…power through.”

Louis shakes his head at him and rolls his eyes. If Harry doesn't like marmite, then that means he's only staying because he wants to spend time with Louis and his family. Louis is not sure what to do with that information, so he settles for staying quiet and letting Harry's easy presence fill the room and his mind.

They continue to watch Say Yes to the Dress while the sound of pots bang and clang in the background. Thirty minutes later, Jay ushers them into the kitchen and makes sure to set an extra spot for Harry next to Louis.

“So, Harry,” his mother starts as they all tuck in. “How’s the bull riding going?”

Louis bites back a groan. He can see the look on his mother’s face, knows she wants to know every detail about the boy that Louis’ been spending so much time with lately. It’s not like they’re a thing, not like they’re actually dating, because, you know, Harry’s dating a girl at the moment and Louis isn’t even sure if Harry swings his way. It’s confusing and irritating and Louis absolutely does not lie in bed at night and think about the way Harry’s lips shape words and stretch over his teeth when he smiles. They're just friends. It's fine. He's tried to explain this to his mother a few times, but she always gives him a knowing smile and says, "of course you're just friends, honey."

“It’s good, I guess. I’m actually one of the uh, top people in my age group. It’s fun, I enjoy it,” Harry stammers out once he swallows his food. “This is really great, by the way. I've never had marmite before, but I like it.”

Louis glances over at him and smiles when he sees that Harry’s being genuine. He’s not pushing the chicken around his plate like he would if he hated it. Maybe he can convert him yet.

“Thank you, Harry,” Jay’s replies with a smile.

“Harry! Riding bulls is scary! Why do you do something scary?” Daisy asks from her seat, nibbling away at a piece of chicken stabbed through with her fork.

“Uh,” Harry chuckles. “It’s a lot of fun and the adrenalin rush is insane. I think I've also kept with it for so long because my dad used to ride bulls before he passed away, and it's kind of like keeping him with me."

Louis perks up at this new information but when he turns to inquire more he notices the slight downturn of Harry’s lips and nudges his foot beneath the table. Harry glances over at him and offers him a small smile, but Louis can see a darkness brewing behind his eyes.

“Oh, well that’s nice, keeping it in the family. I’m sorry about your father. I know it’s hard to lose a family member,” Jay says. After a moment she adds in a mothering tone, “Just be careful, dear, there are quite a few people that would be upset if you got hurt.”

She gives a loaded glance to Louis as he tries to fight a blush from crawling up his cheeks. Harry smiles gently at her in response and nods before shooting his eyes over to Louis and knocking their shoulders together.

“I’ll be alright, Lou. Don’t worry!” he chimes with gusto.

“Yeah,” Louis answers quietly.

The rest of the dinner goes smoothly and Louis only has to interrupt his mother's many questions once or twice. Daisy seems absolutely smitten with Harry, especially when he starts to make faces at her from across the table and challenges her to see who can eat the most green beans the fastest. Lottie twirls her hair and giggles a little more than normal, and Louis tries to keep the bite out of his tone when he addresses her.

Harry sticks around for a while after dinner and the family converges in the living room to watch TV once again. Harry presses up against Louis side and they whisper jokes to each other as they flip through the channels. The night air floating in through the open windows is cool and dry, and if Louis snuggles further into Harry's warmth than is strictly necessary, no one says anything about it. Harry smiles down at him softly, curls framing his face, and gives a quick wink. Maybe he's not being a subtle as he hopes, but at least Harry doesn't pull away.

***

"So how are you enjoying Texas so far?" Liam asks one evening, feet stretched out in front of him as he sits on the floor of Louis' room.

Liam's not great at Geography is the thing, and while Louis isn't either, he's been trying to help him with his project that's due by the end of the week. It has to be a map of Europe with all of the countries and capitals drawn and labeled. Daisy always has an abundance of crayons and craft supplies laying around, so the boys had helped themselves to her collection. Louis keeps glancing at his closed bedroom door to make sure she's not going to come in and start crying that they've taken her stuff.

Louis bends over and places a sparkly pink star sticker on their hand-drawn map where Brussels is supposed to be. He's been on his hands and knees for at least 2 hours now, and while that may not usually be a problem when he's alone in a room with a hot buy beside him, he's got blue and glitter all over his hands and this is definitely not how he thought his life would go when he met a buff country boy.

“I miss the city a bit, but it hasn't been that bad,” Louis answers, double checking to make sure he placed the sticker in the right place. “It’s just really hot here and there’s dirt literally everywhere. I can’t get it off Liam! It’s permanently stuck to my skin and I hate it.”

Liam laughs quietly and points to the next country and capital on the list. “Yeah, that happens when you’re out here.”

They’re silent for a moment, just existing and breathing in the same room. Liam studies his print out and places a few more stickers before writing the capitals into the space they've designated for the key.

“I'm glad you like it here. How have the, uh, riding sessions been?” Liam picks up a misplaced star and studies the map, his thick eyebrows furrowed.

“They've been great! I learned how to gallop the other day and that was so much fun! I feel like I'm flying when I'm on Danger. He's so powerful and it's just such an incredible feeling."

“I know what you mean, dude. I don't ride a lot, but when I do, it's definitely a freeing feeling," Liam answers before triumphantly pumping the air as he fixes their previous capital mistake.

"Why don't you ride a lot?" Louis asks, rolling his shoulders and stretching out his legs. His knees are killing him.

"I had a pretty bad fall a while back, and you know that saying about getting right back on the horse?" Louis nods. "Well, I didn't get back on for a while and now I get a bit skittish when I'm riding and can't make myself go as crazy and fast as I used to."

"That stinks." Louis pats his shoulder consolingly and eyes the poster board. "I think we're almost done. It’s looking pretty sick.”

Liam makes a happy noise deep in his chest and runs a hand through his hair.

"How's Harry?"

Louis' head shoots up, but he tries to act cool and collected. He’s totally got this. He can talk about Harry in a bro-pal platonic way. Totally cool.

"Uh, he's fine. I saw him yesterday for the lessons. Don't you see him every day anyway?"

"I do, I was just wondering. I see him around the farm and in class, but you two have this, like, special bond or whatever, so I was just wondering." Liam shrugs like he didn't just give Louis a heart attack.

"Special bond?" Louis squeaks, pushing his fringe out of his face. "There's no special bond."

Liam eyes him for a moment and then gives a comforting smile.

"It's ok, Louis. I didn't mean anything by it. I just meant that he seems to have really taken a shining to you and you to him. It's nothing bad."

Louis' heart thuds in his chest and he can't decide if he's glad that someone's noticed that he and Harry have been getting closer, or if that's a bad thing and he's being too obvious. He’s pretty sure that Liam’s figured out he’s not exactly into girls, but he doesn’t want to draw suspicion to Harry, especially if he’s anything but straight or still questioning and doesn’t want anyone to know.

"How's Annabelle?" The question's out before Louis even realized it was at the tip of his tongue.

Liam looks at him for a long moment, eyes searching his face for something Louis doesn't want to give him. He wonders if Liam knows just how deep his and Harry's connection is, at least from his side.

"She's good. Harry hasn't really mentioned her lately. She's only really my friend because she's dating Harry, so I don't see her all that much unless she's here visiting him."

"Oh." Louis fiddles with a light green crayon and bites his lip.

"He's been spending all his free time with you." It sounds like he's trying to make a joke, trying to ease the tension, but Liam's comment makes Louis' chest constrict and his muscles tense.

"I, uh, I-"

"I think it's a good thing." Liam whispers it like a secret. "You and him....spending so much time together."

Louis stares at his new friend, sizes up the flannel shirt and the worn-in leather boots poking out of ripped, faded jeans. He's the epitome of a southern boy, with his cropped hair, rugged beard, and tanned skin from working long days outside. Though he looks the part, Louis watches the warmth of his eyes bore into him, his soft looking lips curving into a comforting smile, and is reminded that it’s not right to judge a book by its cover.

"You do?"

"Mmhmm."

They don't say anything for a while, just sit in silence and watch the setting sun through the window. Louis can hear his mother bustling around downstairs, cleaning up the plates from dinner, and Daisy's excited chatter as she talks to Lottie about their TV program. Louis rests his head against his bed and glances over at Liam who's looking right back.

"Thanks." He's not sure what he's thanking him for, but it comes out anyway. Liam nods and nudges his shoulder.

"Let's finish this stupid map, yeah?" Liam asks, leaning forward and grabbing a red marker. That's the end of that.

***

Harry doesn't smile when he greets Louis the following Friday, but he pulls him into a hug nonetheless. Louis pulls back and pouts up at him before poking a finger where his right dimple should be.

"Why the long face?" Louis asks, scratching his nails into the back of Harry's shirt. Harry shivers under his touch.

“I have a long neck. Like a giraffe,” Harry deadpans. Louis squints up at him and gives him an unimpressed eyebrow raise.

"Never mind. Uh, Annabelle and I got into a fight," Harry says, voice rough like he's been crying.

"Oh, what about?" Louis pulls away and takes a seat on the bench by the tack room. The old wood is splintered in places and creaks under his weight, but Harry sits next to him anyway.

"She says I haven't been spending enough time with her, that I don't take her out enough." Harry sighs and tugs on an errant curl. "I'm just super busy, you know? I don't have time to take her out more than once a week."

Louis nods but doesn't say anything. Liam's comment from the other day whirls through his mind. _He's been spending all his free time with you_. Louis tries to feel guilty, he really does, but he doesn't regret any moment he gets to spend watching Harry's sunny smile and hearing his lame jokes he came up with when he was 7 and bored on a farm by himself. He adores spending time with Harry, and it's not even about how gorgeous the boy beside him is. It's about the way Harry sees the world, about his desire to be kind to everyone and the way his passion for the farm and the bull riding flows from him and his eyes shine when he talks about his next event.

"I don't know. Maybe I should take her to dinner or something tonight and try to talk to her. She's been texting me a lot, but I'm just so tired when I get back home that I forget to answer her most of the time."

Louis bites back a smug smile. Ever since the afternoon where he'd missed his lesson and Harry had joined his family for dinner a few weeks ago, they'd been texting back and forth constantly. It wasn’t anything serious, just little anecdotes and facts about their day. It actually allowed their lessons to be much more productive because they didn't spend all of their time sitting and catching up. Harry had managed to text him late into the night just fine, so suck on that Annabelle.

"Yeah, not texting back's the kicker," Louis replies, nudging Harry's knee. "But if it's meant to be, it'll work out, ok?"

He really doesn't want it to work out between Harry and Annabelle, but his desire to see Harry's smile return wins out. Harry nods and steeples his fingers together in his lap. Danger whinnies a few stalls over and they look towards the sound.

"Guess we should start with our lesson. Should I go ahead and tack up?" Louis asks, nodding towards the bridle hanging beside them.

Harry paused for a moment, seemingly suspended in time as his eyes bored into Louis', and clears his throat. "Actually, do you mind if we just chill out here for the day?"

"Sure, whatever you want."

Harry nods and Louis finally sees a smile. It's small, but it's there. Harry stands up and Louis follows as he climbs up a ladder leading to the upper hay loft. He's never been up here before, but he's seen Liam lugging bales up to the top and throwing them out of sight.

"I come up here to think sometimes," Harry explains as he helps Louis up the last bit of the ladder. "It's quiet and the only one that really comes up here is Liam when he's working."

Louis is able to stand up to his full height, while Harry crouches down a few inches. They're sanding on wide planks of wood that create a type of balcony above the barn. Hay is stacked alone the walls and there's a bundle that’s been untied and spread out with a blanket on it, as if to make a bed. Harry leads them over to the blanket and plops down before pulling Louis down next to him.

"Is this where you came the night after the bonfire by the river? I saw you didn't go home," Louis asks as he gets settled, their thighs pressing together as they try to fit on the single blanket.

 Light streams in through the dirty panes of a window and casts a beam of light on the hay in the far corner. Dust floats through the illuminated area and creates a mythical aura, like something out of a fairytale.

"Oh, yeah. Weed always makes my head spin and my thoughts get weird. Like they get cloudy but clearer at the same time. That doesn't make sense, but that's what happens." Harry tugs on his shirt self-consciously. "Needed to take a bit of time to myself and let my thoughts turn their course I guess."

"What were you thinking about?"

Harry doesn't answer for a moment. His eyebrows scrunch and he leans back into the hay, stray pieces sticking to his frizzy curls. He looks up at Louis, large green eyes blinking up at him like a lost deer, and Louis reflexively rests a comforting hand on his knee. Harry freezes for a moment before looking away.

"About life, I guess, and who I wanted to be," his is answer.

"And did you figure it out?" Louis rubs his thumb along the soft, worn patch of denim along Harry's knees, as if he'd been in the field repairing something and had to crouch on his knee for a long time.

He doesn't allow himself to think about Harry on his knees in any other circumstance. That's _not_ happening.

"I...," Harry's staring at him again, plush lips pouting forward as he hesitates. Louis wants to kiss him. The soft light shining into the loft makes Harry look ethereal, long limbs sprawled out on fibers of gold, and emerald eyes seeking for something he can't quite reach. "I'm still working on it."

"Anything I can help with?" There's an unexpected cheek to his voice, a suggestion he didn't realize he was trying to make, and Harry's eyebrows arch up. Louis watches, transfixed, as Harry's tongue darts out to wet his lips.

"Maybe," Harry croaks. His breathing picks up, short bursts of air coming out of his damp lips. "I'm not sure."

Maybe it's the way the loft is something straight out of every romance novel Lottie has ever left lying around the house, or that Harry is so close and smells like clean sweat and sharp aftershave, but Louis craves him. He leans towards Harry's sprawled figure, pressing their sides together as he leans up on his arm and stretches out beside him. They stay that way for a few moments, just watching each other with careful curiosity. Harry reaches up to scratch under his Adam’s apple and Louis tracks the motion of his fingers, longs to place a kiss right where his fingers have made light red indents on his tanned skin.

"Lou," Harry whispers, no louder than a breath, and Louis can't move. He watches, enraptured, as Harry's eyes flicker down to his lips, watches as Harry's small pink tongue runs along his own lips again before he purses them slightly, as if to pucker them for a soft kiss.

The air is stifling, smothering them in dry heat, and Louis wonders distantly if the heat could cause the hay to catch fire just from the temperature. He certainly feels like he's about to catch on fire, his skin burning and blood sizzling. He swallows thickly and leans a bit further into Harry's side, close enough to see his thick eyelashes flutter against the shadows underneath his eyes as he blinks.

"Harry!" someone calls in the distance.

And just like that, the suffocating heat is gone, left only with the chill only a lack of body heat can bring. They spring apart, rolling away and getting hay stuck all over their clothes and in their hair. Harry jumps to his feet, eyes wide and fearful as they dart around the loft.

"Harry!" the voice calls again. It's female and young.

"One second!" Harry shouts, brushing the hay from his clothes. He finally glances down at Louis who's still sprawled on the floor.

Neither of them move, planted in their spots the thought of what almost happened, what they almost allowed themselves to do, what that could have meant. Harry's face is red and his breathing is even quicker than before. Louis wants to reach out and soothe this hair back from his face, tell him it's ok, that it doesn't have to mean anything if he doesn't want it to. He doesn't reach out, doesn't know if he can.

"Harry!" The voice is closer and more impatient. "We need to talk!"

"It's Annabelle," Harry murmurs softly, as if worried he might be heard and she might come up to investigate. "I should go talk to her."

"I-yeah, I guess you should." Louis looks down at the straw between his fingers and doesn't dare look back up at Harry. It's too much.

"I'll text you later, ok?"

"Yeah."

Harry walks over to the ladder and Louis hears him sigh, a frustrated sound with an edge of hurt. He doesn't hear him go down the ladder though, so he finally musters up the courage to look back at Harry.

Harry's face almost breaks him. He's always thought of Harry as this strong, mature man who knows what he wants. He's seen the fire and passion burning in Harry's eyes, heard the way he talks with such confidence that even the most skeptical of believers would follow in his footsteps without a single questions. Right now, he looks scared and confused, small and unsure of what to do.

"Go talk to her Harry. She is your girlfriend, after all. You shouldn’t keep her waiting."

It's not what he means to say, not at all. He means to tell him that they're ok, that everything will be ok and that they'll talk tomorrow about whatever just happened. He can't find the words.

"Yeah, ok." Harry's voice is thick and rough, a lot like it sounded when Louis happened upon him earlier in the afternoon.

Harry disappears then, doesn't say anything else and heads down the ladder. Louis hears him walk through the barn and greet Annabelle outside. His voice sounds jovial, but there's something about it that seems fake. They talk for a bit, Annabelle complaining about how she never sees him, but saying she wants to work on it. Harry agrees a beat later than he probably should, but she doesn't seem to notice.

Louis quietly eases himself down the ladder and walks the opposite way of the voices. They're quieter now, probably standing closer together and whispering sweet nothings to each other, like all couples do after an argument as a form or reassurance that all is well. When he rounds the corner to head back home, he glances back and immediately wishes he hadn't.

Harry's got Annabelle pressed against the barn wall, hands on her hips, and lips firmly attached to hers as her hands tangle in his hair. They pull back a moment later and she buries her face in his shoulder. Harry looks up before Louis can pretend like he wasn’t just staring and their eyes lock. Louis turns way quickly and heads to the safety of his bedroom where he can bury under the covers and try to convince himself he’s still in Seattle and none of this ever happened.

Hours later, as he lies on his mattress, staring at his ceiling and tracing the shape of an old water stain with his eyes, he still can’t get the scared look in Harry’s eyes out of his head.


End file.
